New Fedora

   11.10.09

Be warned, mortals!

I have bought a new fedora.

And blogged to such effect, herein!

(Huzzah.)

Tape Noir

   11.09.09

When passing through the Philadelphia Airport last month, I passed some pieces by Mark Khaisman that were super cool, including this one:

 

 

You can find more at his website. All equally awesome.

(And, yes, as a comics fan, my first thought was "Cool! The Question!")

New Word: Normalnoia

   11.08.09

Whereas "paranoia" is defined as "the irrational belief that someone is out to get you"...

And "paranormal" is defined as "stuff that is totally NOT normal"...

"Normalnoia" is defined as "the perfectly rational belief that someone is out to get you".

As in "Ever since that serial killer moved in next door, he's had a real case of normalnoia."

Not to be confused with that old chestnut, "You're not paranoid if they're really out to get you." If they're out to get you, but there's no real reason to suspect it, you're still being paranoid. You're just paranoid and lucky.

You're only being normalnoid if (a) you think they're out to get you, and (b) they're out to get you, and (c) the reasons why they're out to get you are inherently obvious.

Another example: You may be normalnoid if you are a klansman dancing the funky chicken on stage at the NAACP Image Awards.

Mental health experts are still researching the possible existence of normalnoid schizophrenics -- people beset by a mental illness that causes them to hear voices in their head that precisely correspond to the thoughts that people are contemporaneously thinking about about them.

If you should encounter any of these normalnoid schizophrenics (or "X-Men" for short), please invite them to join your special school and train them to fight supervillains and/or intolerance.

And/or chicken-dancing klansmen.