Off work all this week. Today, I'm going to try to get some cleaning done around the apartment. I also need to get rid of some old furniture that I'm planning on replacing.

And, if I'm lucky (i.e. not lazy), I may get some work done on the novel this evening...

In the meantime, here's a round-up of things I meant to blog about recently, but did not:

1.
For those wondering what the title of the next Bond movie, Quantum of Solace, means, it means the same thing as "Modicrum of Consolation." Another alternate title for the movie would be "Who Gives a Flying F--"

2.
Submitted for your approval. I call this one "Yeah, Cats."

 

 

3.
Sign on train:

 

 

You may say I'm quibbling, but I take issue with the fact that this sign is labeled "danger." Really, it should be labeled "good advice." See, if the sign was really describing danger, it would tell you what would happen if you got off the moving train. For instance, if the concern was that the train often passes tanks of water filled with sharks, the sign might read "Danger: Sharks." See, in the revised version, the sign tells you the SOURCE of the danger.

That's why I think that this sign should be relabeled "Danger: The Conductor Sometimes Opens The Doors While The Train Is Still Moving Because He's A Nasty Old Buzzard."

Moving on.

4.
One more sign:

 

 

For those with less than 2000/20 vision, the sign reads: "SAUSAGE MUFFIN WITH EGG 2 FOR $3.00 LIMIT 4 PER CUSTOMER, PER VISIT."

Now, as you can probably tell, this isn't official McDonald's signage. Clearly, this is the work of an aggrieved assistant manager with some time on his hands and a working copy of Print Shop Pro.

But I have to ask... Was hypothetical assistant manager being duly cautious in establishing the "LIMIT 4 PER CUSTOMER, PER VISIT." rule or was he forced to add the rule after an anarchic, aborted trial period?

In my head, I'm imagining that the guy from the Monopoly game showed up and said to himself, "2 for $3.00? Why that deal is too good to pass up! I shall take 50 million of them!"

And the hypothetical assistant manager, ever the clever Nellie, simply smiled and said, "Not a problem, Mister Monopoly. But I will need you to purchase those muffins as 12.5 million separate transactions."

5.
On MSNBC right now, President Bush is speaking to, um... I think a furniture warehouse...

I specifically tuned in this hour, because Chuck Todd was supposed to anchor an hour of debate preview chatter. My conclusion? George Bush doesn't like Chuck Todd.